Dudeism is something you feel in your heart, but sometimes it can be fortifying to wear it on your sleeve or announce it to the public. Or tattoo it on your forehead. It’s your roll, dude.
Turns out Glenn Clark and Drew Forrester, two DJs at Baltimore radio station WNST felt they wanted to really affirm their commitment to Dudeism. So they invited The Arch Dudeship Dwayne Eutsey onto their show to help lead them in an official ceremony.
Dwayne bumped himself up into a higher lax bracket and came up with a far out list of vows for them to repeat on-air.
Good times and even a few choice Caddyshack references were enjoyed by all. Listen here
Here’s the transcript of the vows for those of you who don’t elect to fucking listen occasionally (and that’s cool, that’s cool):
Intro:
In this uptight world of pain filled with real reactionaries and nihilists running around threatening to cut off our johnsons and whatnot, the Dude calls each of us to just take it easy, man.
As a Dudeist Priest, you are called to achieve this modest task by abiding through all the strikes and gutters that the cosmic bowling alley rolls your way.
The Church of the Latter-Day Dude has unfolded these vows (in a parlance that won’t violate FCC obscenity rules) to help you really tie your life together as an official Dudeist Priest.
Are you ready to take that hill?
Vows:
Repeat after me:
As an ordained Dudeist Priest, I (state your name) vow:
- To just take it easy, man
- To spread the dude word when it’s not too exhausting
- To always make time to have some burgers, some beers, a few laughs
- To check in to see what condition my condition is in
- To not treat objects like women, man
- To uh…lost my train of thought there
- To keep my mind limber
- To enjoy natural, zesty enterprises while fixing the cable
- To never repeat what a stranger on the phone tells me to say
- And always, in a world gone crazy, to abide
So help me Dude.
Outro:
Now, my Brother Shamuses, go forth, abide, and to thine own self be Dude.
Lord, you can imagine where it goes from here.
Now while these vows might prove a little too esoteric for use at an ordinary wedding party, any of you Dudeist Priests out there who want to utilize them for any ceremonies should feel free to do so. Also feel free to change them around, insert your own favorite lines from the film or from other Dudely sources of your choosing.
Or just repeat them to yourself the next time you’re laying on the rug or hanging out in the tub. They’ll help keep your mind limber.
Well ArchDudeship, I dig your style man. The idea of Dudeist Priests’ vows is cool, they really tie the room together. I’ll try to translate them in Italian if I’m able to maintain the correct nomenclature. And then maybe in the future I’ll add the Dudeist Marriage ceremony. Pretty cool Dwayne. :)
Thankee, AF!
BTW, here’s a link to our sample Dudeist wedding ceremony, for those into the whole matrimony thing:
http://dudespaper.com/no-frame-of-reference-8.html/
This is an oath we should repeat to ourselves on occasion, to remind us of our moral obligation to “take it easy man” and Abide. That, plus an oat soda or two. Time for one now….
Right on, Doctor Joe. A couple of oath sodas…
A great listen! I am weeping from the sentiment of the penultimate line “To never repeat what a stranger on the phone tells me to say”. Beautiful, man!
Dude!!!!!!!