Dear Dudely recently received a very inspiring letter by a wiser feller than us. We’re pleased to share it with you. If anyone has a dude frame of reference when it comes to dying face down in the muck, this compadre of ours sure does.
Though this is normally an advice column, in this case the advice is coming from the dude writing in. That advice? Just like that feller in Spinal Tap said: “Have a good time, all of the time.” Even when that time’s up. Enjoy!
Hello, there Dudeness,
Some new things have come to light, Man, and, instead of, you know, running around, you might want to share this with our fellow Dudes.
As an OLD Dude, approaching that time in life where the thought of, well, not being around much longer, I am making plans. My son thinks I am nuts, but, well, yeah. Naturally, I plan on being cremated, as anyone concerned about land use would want to consider. The problem is, finding the large Folgers coffee can. They don’t make those any more; everything is plastic, Man, you know? HOWEVER, a friend’s mother passed away recently and she was a lady that never threw out anything. When my friend went to retrieve whatever was left in the house, she discovered….that’s right, a LARGE Folgers coffee can. So, knowing my plans, she brought the can back for me. Now, that’s a friend! Various bars in my neighborhood will be given the honor of displaying the can for periods of 6 months each. The can cannot have any identification on it, just the can. That way, old Donnie (my real name IS Donald) will be honored for a long time.
All of us Dudes out here would like to go out that way. Death does not have to be some old dreary, humorless, or dark mess. That’s not the way I lived my life, Man….you know? I have been retired for 15 years, but I still carry around a leather case with stuff. When some nosy asshole asks, "Whacha got in da bag, Man?", I always say, "Papers. Papers. Business papers, you know." And they invariably follow with, "What do you DO, Man?" With just the right pause, I reply, "I’m uh, unemployed…"
I will abide.
For world-wide Dudeness,
DONALD WAITS (Mad Dog)
New Orleans, LA
The Arch Dudeship says
Way to go, Donny!
Sounds like you can die with a smile on your face knowing the God Lord didn’t gyp you, man.
I hope I’ll approach the bosom of the Pacific Ocean the same way.
Thank you for sharing.
This is an amazing story, my man.
Abide, dude. We’ll all be catchin’ ya on down the trail.
I personally can relate, however, I have saved a Maxwell house coffee can as my final vessel of transportation. Since that is my cup “O” joe, in the morning. As I recall they went to Ralph’s and bought the coffee can, so as not to spend an inordinate amount of cash on the container. I was wondering if Folgers was Walter’s choice, being the alpha or Dude’s choice, knowing it was Donnie’s brand ?
As my good friend Mike McGinley would say,
” You may be over thinking this, Jones ”
Am I, or does anybody know ?
This sounds like a great way to make the last travel! See you some time later dude!
Man, that is it, Donny…you really got it going on, Dude. You gotta make sure someone lets us all know when the day comes, amigo. There’ll be a lot of oat sodas hoisted for you. PS, I’m just down the road a ways in Lafayette.
Rev. AF says
Seems to me you are an example for us all. You’ve unfolded a pretty good teaching which I’ll surely remember. Far out dude.